This is the eighteenth in a series of periodic reflections on the "ordinary things" that many people do on a regular basis without much thought. During this pandemic, I am developing a need to "rage, rage" against hast and laziness and replace it with care and attention. My hope is to become personally more intentional about doing ordinary things with care and focused attention, while inspiring others to maybe do the same.
PEOPLE WATCHING
If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body thrown into Gehenna.
Matthew 5:29
We all do it! We are constantly watching other people in the privacy of our own minds, but have you ever watched how you watch? Have you ever thought about what you are thinking about the people you are looking at?
Have you ever noticed yourself judging, evaluating, measuring or even lusting after them in your heart? "She's way too fat! She must eat everything in sight!" "That is the ugliest tattoo I have ever seen! It must be homemade!" "Why in the world would anyone that old be dressing like that?" "She really is beautiful, but she has a nasty disposition!" "He must work out everyday to have a body like that! Too bad his teeth are crooked and rotten!" "My God! Where did she get that outfit? Walmart?" "Wow! If I were going bald, I don't think I would wear a hairpiece if I couldn't afford a better one than that! It looks like a dead cat sitting on his head!" "I think if I were that fat, I would not wear such tight clothes!" "I wonder where they got the money to buy a car like that? Probably from selling drugs or borrowing the money on extended credit!
The other evening, I watched the sidewalk along Eastern Parkway in front of my condo. There was a woman walking up the hill to the bus stop. I imagined she was a worker at the nursing home down the street on her way home. I imagined her being exhausted from a bus ride that morning and a long day of changing adult diapers at the nursing home. I imagined her having another long bus ride home, cooking supper for her family, doing laundry and maybe even having to face an abusive husband and the care of several dependent children. I wished her well! I sent all the positive energy I could muster. I prayed that God would take care of her, that she had friends who could encourage her and that she would have health good enough to sustain her.
One afternoon last week, I looked out at the sidewalk. I saw a couple of teenagers walking, talking and laughing with each other. They were quite loud about it. Instead of being irritated at their noise, I wished them all the happiness they could handle. I prayed they would be successful in life, protected from drug abuse, poverty and disease. I hoped they would live a long life and grow up to be excellent parents and contributing citizens.
Another day, I saw a young girl, over-weight, tattooed, nose pierced and green-dyed hair. She had squeezed into some skin-tight pants - or at least she tried to! At first, I thought to myself, "how pathetic!" Then I realized that she was probably a very lonely soul, desperately wanting to fit in and wanting to be trendy like "other girls." I imagined her being teased, laughed at and verbally abused by cruel peers. I sent her a spiritual hug and asked God to protect her, help her find peace of mind and let her know that she was valuable in his eyes...and hopefully in the eyes of some significant others.
Last week, I became outraged at the people who were gathering in large close groups, without masks, and risking not only their health, but the health of those they would come in contact with later on! At first, I was becoming angrier and angrier by the moment. I think I even called them "selfish dumb-asses" under my breath! Then I stopped and tried to think of them as simply "ignorant" and "not knowing any better!" I prayed they would be protected and I prayed that those they would come into contact with would be protected as well! I prayed that God would help them "wake up" and realize how much pain they could bring to themselves and those they love - maybe even to their parents and grandparents!
In a world where selfish, rude, crude and crass behavior is becoming a norm, the practice of "blessing people" is becoming harder and harder to do. We may not be able to change other people's public behavior, but we can try to change ours - choosing not to become mean and nasty in our responses. If we can't change them, at least we don't have to join them!
Have you ever noticed yourself judging, evaluating, measuring or even lusting after them in your heart? "She's way too fat! She must eat everything in sight!" "That is the ugliest tattoo I have ever seen! It must be homemade!" "Why in the world would anyone that old be dressing like that?" "She really is beautiful, but she has a nasty disposition!" "He must work out everyday to have a body like that! Too bad his teeth are crooked and rotten!" "My God! Where did she get that outfit? Walmart?" "Wow! If I were going bald, I don't think I would wear a hairpiece if I couldn't afford a better one than that! It looks like a dead cat sitting on his head!" "I think if I were that fat, I would not wear such tight clothes!" "I wonder where they got the money to buy a car like that? Probably from selling drugs or borrowing the money on extended credit!
To be honest, I have to admit that I have caught myself engaged in judging, evaluating and measuring people! Doing those things is a bad habit that I am intentionally trying to correct. I am still "people watching," but I am trying to do it with a different outlook. I bless them! I try to think of all they are probably dealing with and I wish them well and pray that they will thrive and flourish in life!
The other evening, I watched the sidewalk along Eastern Parkway in front of my condo. There was a woman walking up the hill to the bus stop. I imagined she was a worker at the nursing home down the street on her way home. I imagined her being exhausted from a bus ride that morning and a long day of changing adult diapers at the nursing home. I imagined her having another long bus ride home, cooking supper for her family, doing laundry and maybe even having to face an abusive husband and the care of several dependent children. I wished her well! I sent all the positive energy I could muster. I prayed that God would take care of her, that she had friends who could encourage her and that she would have health good enough to sustain her.
One afternoon last week, I looked out at the sidewalk. I saw a couple of teenagers walking, talking and laughing with each other. They were quite loud about it. Instead of being irritated at their noise, I wished them all the happiness they could handle. I prayed they would be successful in life, protected from drug abuse, poverty and disease. I hoped they would live a long life and grow up to be excellent parents and contributing citizens.
Another day, I saw a young girl, over-weight, tattooed, nose pierced and green-dyed hair. She had squeezed into some skin-tight pants - or at least she tried to! At first, I thought to myself, "how pathetic!" Then I realized that she was probably a very lonely soul, desperately wanting to fit in and wanting to be trendy like "other girls." I imagined her being teased, laughed at and verbally abused by cruel peers. I sent her a spiritual hug and asked God to protect her, help her find peace of mind and let her know that she was valuable in his eyes...and hopefully in the eyes of some significant others.
Last week, I became outraged at the people who were gathering in large close groups, without masks, and risking not only their health, but the health of those they would come in contact with later on! At first, I was becoming angrier and angrier by the moment. I think I even called them "selfish dumb-asses" under my breath! Then I stopped and tried to think of them as simply "ignorant" and "not knowing any better!" I prayed they would be protected and I prayed that those they would come into contact with would be protected as well! I prayed that God would help them "wake up" and realize how much pain they could bring to themselves and those they love - maybe even to their parents and grandparents!
In a world where selfish, rude, crude and crass behavior is becoming a norm, the practice of "blessing people" is becoming harder and harder to do. We may not be able to change other people's public behavior, but we can try to change ours - choosing not to become mean and nasty in our responses. If we can't change them, at least we don't have to join them!
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