Most of you know my story by now – how I got to the
priesthood and many of my adventures since, but today’s readings make me want
to tell you again, but hopefully in a new way.
I knew I wanted to be a priest when I was in the
second grade and I have never wanted to be anything else since. I entered
seminary at age fourteen, the earliest possible date, of my own free will. No
one talked to me into it. In fact, most of the adults in my life, including my
pastor, tried to talk me out of it or tried to make sure I didn’t make it. Of
course, the reasons I started were not the same reasons I stayed. Who could
know at age fourteen? For twelve rough seminary years, with God’s help, I
overcame all the obstacles thrown on my path and kept my eye on the finish line
– ordination to the priesthood, which came when I was twenty-six years
old.
Almost fifty years later, here I am still standing,
still priesting and very happy doing it. My goal is to die at a ripe old age
with my collar on, doing some kind of priestly ministry.
I have never looked back, never regretted it and never
seriously thought about anything else. There were a couple of days, back when
the sexual abuse scandal broke, when I actually thought about it for the first
time, but it soon passed.
I am very aware that I did not do this of my own power
and strength. I have felt God’s strength helping me all the way. Looking back,
I can see clearly that even the setbacks, disappointments and failure have all
been part of God’s plan for me. In fact, some of the greatest blessing in life
have come to me as a result of remaining faithful to my call through thick and
thin. At 75, I can say unabashedly that I am a happy man, a man who has been
blessed in more ways than I ever thought imaginable.
Today we have some wonderful readings about making
commitments. In the gospel, three different people wish to make commitments to
following Jesus and Jesus warns them about how easy commitments are to make and
how hard they are to keep. Surely, we can all see ourselves in one or more of
these people.
The first man is gushing with enthusiasm. He
represents the people among us who rush into commitments without much serious thought. Think
of that incredibly stupid and naïve TV program “90 Day Fiance!” The man in the
gospel says to Jesus, “I will follow you wherever you go!” Jesus stops him in
his tracks with a warning. “My friend, before you can follow me, you must count
the cost before you get in and you must be willing to pay the price after you
get in, because following me is not a cake-walk. It requires the ability
to handle much suffering.”
The second man wants to follow Jesus, but he wants to
put it off for a while until the time is right, until things are taken care of,
until, until, until…..” He represents the people among us who procrastinate,
hoping for the right time, the ideal situation, the perfect circumstance. Jesus
says to him, “Don’t bother! It’s either now or never! Either commit now or
forget it!”
The third man wants to follow Jesus, but as soon as he
commits, he begins to second-guess himself. He represents the people among us
who are always looking around for a better deal, looking back at the options
they didn’t take, looking ahead at ways they can get around their
commitments.
These readings are so appropriate today when
commitments are in a deep crisis. We live in a world of the “latest best
offer.” Today, commitments are often made without thought and abandoned without
guilt. Today, commitments are delayed longer and made later and later in life,
with some people never getting around to making a commitment to anything
permanent. Today, commitments are made more often than they are kept, because
many commit with a roaming eye, especially when those commitments require
anything painful.
The greatest joy in life, I believe, is making a
commitment and keeping it. To have this joy, you have to count the cost
beforehand and you have to be willing to pay the price afterwards. No, keeping
a commitment is not easy in the short run, but in the long, it is a source of
great satisfaction.
Young people here today, there is a lesson here for
you, especially because you are at the age when life commitments are
traditionally made.
(1) Some of you will be tempted to rush into
commitments that you do not yet have the inner resources to keep. Anyone can make a
commitment, but it takes a very “together” person to carry though on it. Look
before you leap, especially before marriage! That person in front of you might
look good and make you feel good today, but the real test is whether you can
live with them and love them when they no longer look good and you no longer
feel good about them? Do you have enough insight into yourself and enough inner
strength to love them “for better or for worse, for richer for poorer, in
sickness and in health, until death do you part?” If you want to look for role
models, forget the rich and famous of Hollywood! They are the worst role models
for keeping commitments. Most of them have disaster after disaster in their
personal lives. Their children are harmed in the process. Rather, look at
somebody who knows what they are talking about, somebody who has a proven track
record. Look at your grandparents, for instance, anybody who has loved another
through thick and thin! That’s where you will find out how to do it!
(2) Many of you have so many options that you are
paralyzed by those very options. Some of you will find it hard to get around to
committing to anything - be it a major in college, a profession or a
relationship – because you will hold out for the perfect option. Since there
are no perfect options, you may find yourself going into your forties without
ever having made a choice. Commit to something and give it all you’ve got! The
word “decide” means to cut in two. When you decide, you choose something
and you reject something. You cannot have your cake and eat it too! A
choice is hard to make, yes, but it also brings a certain freedom from having
to explore choice after choice, after choice.
(3) Many of you may have already rushed into some
simple commitments, failed to keep them and learned from your mistakes. Maybe
it was a relationship that you got into too quickly, when things only looked
good. Maybe you bought a new car on credit with money you did not have, only to
see it repossessed and ruining your credit. Those kinds of simple mistakes can
actually be great learning experiences. Hopefully, you have learned the lesson
that Jesus is trying to teach all of us today: don’t rush into commitments
before you know yourself and the one to whom you are committing. Count the cost
first, and once a commitment is made, do not look back in regret or look around
for a better offer.
When you are merely interested in something, you do it
when it’s convenient. When you are totally committed to something you do it no
matter what! Only then can you experience the joy that comes from keeping a
well-thought-out commitment.
