CONTENTED

 A SATISFIED MIND

A few Saturday's ago, I got up a little earlier than I needed to because I was looking forward to my daily cups of coffee and doing the final editing of the next day's homily. With two cups down the hatch and the homily finished and printed off, I wearily started my daily "discipline" on my treadmill. Since I had seen it before, I could take breaks from the movie on the TV in front of me, "Forest Gump," and come back for a few more minutes and continue my run and remember exactly where I left off in that wonderful Tom Hanks movie. In my estimation, the weather outside was "just perfect," causing me to grab a few minutes out on the deck to bask in the fresh air between "doing time" on the treadmill and watching "Forest Gump" evolve into adulthood. 

At some point, going back and forth from the treadmill to the deck, I felt that amazing contentment of living alone that comes over me ever once in a while! An awareness hit me that day of just how much I love having my own place, with no interruptions except my own, with nothing to do and no place to go! It was one of those moments when I realized what a gift "retirement" really is and what "contentment" is really all about.  

My first memory of being "contented" like that was one spring day when I had the fabulous luck of being the recipient of a special grace from my overly busy mother who never had "a minute to herself" much less "time for" special individual attention to one of her three small children. I was probably four years old when she invited me to sit in her lap in a rocking chair in preparation for my afternoon nap. I don't think, at least up till that time, I could recall ever having Mom completely to myself! I can still remember the breeze coming through the open window in front of us with the sheer curtains waving in that breeze. I can still remember looking up at her face as she hummed a song to me. It was sheer "contentment" - the contentment that I have always imagined that heavenly beings experience. 

Every once in a while I remember being at home, having just turned eight or nine, whining to my mother that "we don't have anything to do!" I had to learn the hard way how counter-productive that whining was when she put us to work! Evidently, I had forgotten the total freedom of the "good old days" of early childhood when we could spend long hours entertaining ourselves just playing in the nearby woods.

I am truly blessed. I realize it every time I take the opportunity to seriously reflect on my situation. Whether it is in the early morning out on my deck with a cup of coffee or it is in the evening with a nice tall Tanquery and tonic with lots of ice and a slice of lime with a good friend and even a good book, I know what peace and contentment means!  "Through all the tumult and the strife, I hear the music ringing. It sounds and echoes in my soul. How can I keep from singing?" 

I realize that I "have it good" and I am very thankful! At seventy-seven, maintaining good health is the only thing I really worry about! So far. so good! 

A SATISFIED MIND

How many times have you heard someone say
If I had his money, I would do things my way
But little they know, that it's so hard to find
One rich man in ten with a satisfied mind

Money can't buy back your youth when you're old
Friend when you're lonely, or peace to your soul
The wealthiest person is a pauper at times
Compared to the man with a satisfied mind

My life is over and my time has run out
My friends and my loved ones, I'll leave these no doubt
One things for certain, when it comes my time
I'll leave this old world with a satisfied mind
I'll leave this old world with a satisfied mind
My life is over and my time has run out

My friends and my loved ones, I'll leave these no doubt
But one things for certain, when it comes my time
I'll leave this old world with a satisfied mind
One things for certain, when it comes my time
I'll leave this old world with a satisfied mind.

Explain

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Songwriters: Red Hays, Jack Rhodes

Satisfied Mind lyrics © CARLIN AMERICA INC

 

 

 

                 

KNOTT-SO-FUNNY #2

 

WHEN I AM FORCED TO SURRENDER

“I would imagine there are days when Superman wakes up, glances at his cape, and wonders when someone will come to save him.”

Tyler Knott Gregson, Poet

At the beginning of my young adult life, because I had been under the paralyzing control of other people for so long, I made myself a promise. I promised myself that, whatever happened, I would not let myself be completely  "owned" by anyone or anything. I worked hard to gain my independence. I even made plans to protect my independence. I resisted anyone or anything that threatened that independence. Always afraid  that someone would come and try to take it away from me, I may have ended up being somewhat of a "control freak." I certainly would not consider myself in a psychologically dangerous place with it, but simply a little overly cautious about losing my freedom. Maybe my love of living alone comes from the fact that it gives me the space and time to rest and relax with nothing to defend and nothing to protect. 

As I age, I am becoming more and more aware that a day is coming when I will not be able to maintain my hard-earned, sacred independence. My greatest dread is the day that I might have to surrender to the control of other people once again. I am afraid that I won't be able to handle it and there will be nothing I can do about it.  I am reminded of a Scripture passage of which I am not that fond! 

When you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.

John 21:18

I have always thought that the best way to die would be at home, after a short and painless illness, just after giving a well-rehearsed farewell speech to adoring friends and relatives. Knowing that that scene is only in the movies, I would settle for a quick painless death in a sociably acceptable situation. However it happens, knowing me, I will probably be trying to micro-manage it, if at all possible, up to the last minute! 

 FROM AN OLD FAVORITE MOVIE "HAROLD AND MAUDE"

"If You Want To Sing Out, Sing Out"

Well, if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free, be free
'Cause there's a million things to be
You know that there are

And if you want to live high, live high
And if you want to live low, live low
'Cause there's a million ways to go
You know that there are

[Chorus:]
You can do what you want
The opportunity's on
And if you can find a new way
You can do it today
You can make it all true
And you can make it undo
you see ah ah ah
its easy ah ah ah
You only need to know

Well if you want to say yes, say yes
And if you want to say no, say no
'Cause there's a million ways to go
You know that there are

And if you want to be me, be me
And if you want to be you, be you
'Cause there's a million things to do
You know that there are

[Chorus]

Well, if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free, be free
'Cause there's a million things to be
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are
You know that there are

ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL

Wake Up, Jesus! 

Don't You Care That We Are Drowning? 

A violent squall came up and waves were breaking over the boat.  Jesus was asleep on a cushion.

Mark 4

Have you ever been so scared, so panic-stricken, so overwhelmed with terror that you thought you’d die? We even talk about being “scared to death.” Most of us have been protected from such feelings, except maybe for a few seconds on a mega-roller coaster. Sadly, there are people in this world who live year in and year out in sheer terror of losing their lives or the lives of their loved one’s through violence and poverty. Some, like the passengers on the plane that went down over Pennsylvania on 9/11 or the planes that plowed into the Twin Towers in New York, leave this world in such a heightened panic-stricken state. It must be a human being’s worst nightmare to clearly know that he or she is going to die in a few seconds without the means to stop it. I will never forget the video I forced myself to watch back in 2015. It was a video of twenty-one young men, Coptic Christians, forced to kneel on a beach in Libya moments before having all 21 of their heads cut off by terrorists standing behind them with their knives pulled and ready. I could see the terror in their faces as they as were no doubt thinking about their families and friends, their eyes closed, their heads bowed and their lips moving in prayer, realizing what was about to happen to them! Sheer terror is surely one of the most painful human emotions. A few sadistic people, both Christians and non-Christians, have been known to take delight in watching their victims suffer, suspended in panic and terror. Other people, even some professed non-believers, naturally turn to God at those moments. As the old saying goes, “There are no atheists in foxholes!”

It is such a situation that Mark describes in today’s gospel. Every detail of the story is important. It was during the dark of evening when they got into a small fishing boat to set sail across open water. A violent squall came out of nowhere and waves started breaking over the boat causing it to start sinking. Imagine what it is like being in an open boat, on a lake, in a storm, after dark. They must have been “scared to death.” I know I would have been because I have had the experience of watching one of my friends drown right in front of me when I was in high school. To this day, I can still see the sheer panic in his eyes as he went under for the final time and never came back up! I can still remember staring at the dark water where he had disappeared. The gospel story of today’s storm says that Jesus was stretched out on a cushion, appearing to be asleep, through all of it! When they woke him, he quieted the raging sea and calmed their panicked hearts.

I believe that this event actually happened, but the fact that it happened is not as important as why the early church told and re-told this story and even put it into its Scriptures. The early church, persecuted for their faith, saw themselves besieged by storms while the ascended Jesus seemed to them to be indifferent and absent in their time of need! They were being tortured and killed for their faith and they intensely felt the absence of Jesus as they suffered. To them, Jesus seemed to be sleeping through all of it. They knew, however, that when they turned to him in prayer and in faith, he was able to calm their fears and restore their peace of mind. In such situations, they would, no doubt, recall his words to them while he was still with them here on earth: “Peace I leave with you. My peace I give you.”

There are several stories in the gospels about being out on the water in a storm when Jesus came to the rescue. They are old stories, told and retold, to give subsequent generations strength and hope during times of trial, when Jesus seemed to be so far away and even disinterested. I used one of these stories on my 25th ordination anniversary to describe the courage I had received, especially during the rough times. I chose the story of Peter’s walk on water. Peter was able to walk on water, even in a storm, as long as he kept his eyes fixed on Jesus. When he looked away from Jesus and focused on how deep the water was and how high the waves were, he began to sink. It was only when he reached out to Jesus that he was helped from going under. Many times, over the last 51 years, I have felt that I was going under, but as long as I was able to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus, I have been able to manage my fear and maintain my inner peace.

Some of you here today are probably going through a rough time right now, feeling that you are sinking or drowning in the storm that is battering you: a terrible health diagnosis, an abusive relationship, a loveless marriage-gone-bad, a drug addicted child, an alcoholic spouse, sick elderly parents, the loss of a job or even bankruptcy. I am sure that some of you have had the feeling that God seems to be absent or asleep or even disinterested in your situation. Hopefully, today’s gospel holds a message for you – the message that Jesus never sleeps and, when called on, can calm your terrified and worried heart and, in time, make your storm subside!

The older I get, the more opportunities I have to look back on and the more experiences I have under my belt. I would say I have learned two things: (a) most of what I worried about never happened and (b) even if they did happen, some surprising blessings came out of many of those bad experiences. In fact, some of the best things in my life have come out of some of the stormiest times of my life. This has happened so often, that I am often able to turn toward Jesus earlier and earlier in the storm, knowing that he is there for me, even when he appears to be asleep. I have been reminded many times of the words of Jesus. “Fear is useless. What is needed is trust.”

We often talk about “faith” as if it is a noun, a “thing” we have one day and a “thing” we lose the next. “Faith” is really a verb. It is something we “do.” It is something we do when all seems lost. In situations like that the question is this. Can you trust God in a radical way - not just when everything is going well, but when everything seems to be going wrong, when you feel like you are in a sinking boat, out on a lake, after dark and in a storm?

The message from Jesus to us today is this – “Do not let your hearts be troubled! Put your faith and trust in me!” I still remember the words of a 98 year old friend, a parishioner here, when I visited her right before she died. I asked her if she was scared. She said quite confidently, “No, I’m not scared of dying, Father. God has always taken care of me. I trust that, when the time comes, he will be there for me again. I am not scared or worried!” After 98 years, it doesn't get any better than that! 

GOD ON THE MOUNTAIN

IS STILL GOD IN THE VALLEY

Life is easy, when you're up on the mountain
And you've got peace of mind, like you've never known
But things change, when you're down in the valley
Don't lose faith, for your never alone

For the God on the mountain, is still God in the valley
When things go wrong, he'll make them right
And the God of the good times, is still God in the bad times
The God of the day, is still God in the night
We talk of faith way up on the mountain
But talk comes easy, when life's at its best
Now its down in the valleys, trials and temptations
That's where your faith is really put to the test

For the God on the mountain, is still God in the valley,
When things go wrong, he'll make them right
And the God of the good times, is still God in the bad times
The God of the day, is still God in the night
The God of the day, is still God in the night