I am very aware that I am bombarded every day with
messages about how I ought to live, how I ought to think, what I ought to buy and what I ought to do.
Depending on the source, I try my best not to listen to most of those messages.
So that I can freely and deliberately "take the road less traveled,"
I collect insightful quotations, wise sayings and other tidbits of wisdom and
paste them everywhere in my house to remind myself that I am in charge of my
own thinking, that I need not be a victim of what “everybody else is
doing" or "what everybody else is thinking." I want to
consciously control my own thinking and make my own decisions so that I do not
end up unconsciously being a gullible "copycat" of what other people
are doing and thinking. I realized a long time ago, that if I am going to be a
priest, I must walk the talk. I realized that I must at least try to set
an example for others. To do that, I realized that I have to try to remove the
wooden beam in my own eye first, if I am going to be able to see clearly to
remove the splinter in somebody else's eye." Otherwise, I will end up
being a blind guide for other blind people and both of us will end up in a
ditch!
On one wall of my house, where I can see it often, is
this George Bernard Shaw quote. “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is
about creating yourself.” This might not mean much to some of you, but for me
it symbolizes the greatest breakthrough in thinking that I have ever had in my
life. Until I was a junior in college, I used to believe that “life was
something that happens to you and all you can do is make the most of it.” As a
result, I ended up always being a “victim” - ultimately being what the same George Bernard
Shaw called, “a selfish, feverish little clod of grievances and ailment
complaining that the world would not get together to make me happy.” One day,
in a flash of grace, it occurred to me quite clearly that "there was no
rescue party out looking for me!" That day I made a clear, conscious
decision to quit whining from the back seat of my own life and to get behind
the wheel! I have told my story hundreds of times, but I also know that every time I tell it, it always inspires someone to make a similar shift in
their thinking. I am hoping that it will help someone here today who needs to
make a shift in his or her thinking away from victimhood toward
self-empowerment - to get a grip on themselves and quite waiting for a rescue
party to come and magically “save” them!
My fellow Catholics! The second reading today is about
the importance of building your life on a solid foundation, but before you can
even consider what foundation you want to build on, you must understand and
accept the fact that you are the builder of your own life! You are
responsible for how your life turns out! If you build your life on the
rock-solid foundation of sound thinking that leads to good choices, if you “get
it” that life is about you creating yourself, you will most probably
thrive! If, however, you build your life on the sand of weak thinking and lazy
choices, you will surely doom yourself to the “swamps of regret” and the world
of “might have beens!”
Most of you are familiar with the monk, Thomas Merton.
We have his library at Bellarmine University where I use to work as its longest
serving campus minister. People come from far and wide to use that library and
absorb his wisdom. Many of you may not be as familiar with the founder of his
religious community, the Cistercians. He was a Benedictine monk named Bernard
of Clairvaux. St. Bernard was a great reformer in the Church of the 12th
century. He might have died over 860 years ago, but his wisdom lives on and it
is valuable even today – even for those of us in here today! He offers
us four foundation pillars on which to build a good life based on the words of
Jesus who said,“A good tree does not bear rotten
fruit, nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit." If your life is to
produce good fruit, St. Bernard says you must (a) consider yourself (b)
consider those below you (c) consider those around you and (d) consider Him who
are above you.
(a) In considering yourself, St Bernard said, “Behold
what you are! It is a monstrous thing to see such dignity trivialized and
squandered!” The first foundation stone on which to build a successful
life is a passionate commitment to your own personal excellence – becoming the
best version of yourself that you can become! I learned a little maxim in Latin
many years ago which I have found to be so true. “Nemo dat quad non
habet” “One cannot give what one does not have.” Jesus said, “A bad tree
cannot bear good fruit.” St. Francis de Sales said, “Be who you are and be that
well!” In practical terms, if you are going to marry, be good at it, be a
fabulous partner or don’t get married! If you are going to have kids, be good
at it, be an effective parent or don’t have them! If you are going to go into
public service, be good at it, be transparent, be honest and be self-giving or
don’t get into it at all! If you are going to a priest, get serious about it or
don’t get ordained! Be who you say you are! Be a person of integrity. Do the
right thing even when no one is looking!
(b) In considering those below you, you must never
forget that the gifts you have been given have been given to you, not just for
your own good and personal benefit, but for the good of the community! The
second foundation stone on which to build a successful life is a passionate
commitment to vocational excellence, to be the very best you can be at what you
do! This means a lifelong commitment to honing your skills, to deepening
your respect and reverence for those under your charge and to always trying to
lift the vision of others to higher sights, their performance to a higher
standard and their personalities beyond their normal
limitations. Yes, become an example of who people want to
follow!
(c) In considering those around you, take stock of
those with whom you surround yourself! The third foundation stone on which to
build a successful life is to choose your friends and associates wisely. Many
people do not realize the impact the type of people they surround themselves
with has on their well-being. Our friends in AA know that part of becoming sober
is not hanging out with drinkers at bars! The people you surround yourself with
will either lift you up or bring you down, support you or criticize you,
motivate you or drain you. By developing relationships with those committed to
constant improvement and the pursuit of the best that life has to offer, you
will have plenty of company on your path to the top of whatever mountain you
seek to climb. Remember, people who tell you what you want to hear are not
necessarily your friends, just as those who tell you what you don’t want to
hear are not necessarily your enemies. Surround yourself with people of
integrity and quality. Do not hang out with lazy thinkers and undisciplined
people! Instead of building you up, they will bring you
down!
(d) Last of all, in considering Him who is above you,
never forget where you came from and where you are going. You have not always
been here and you will not always be here! In the whole scheme of things, your
lifespan is relatively short. The fourth and final foundation stone on which to
build a successful life, therefore, is to develop an interior spiritual life to
match your external material life, so that you can walk on two legs, not one!
Statistically, marriages with God in them, for example, last longer and are
happier. The same can probably be said of other vocations and professions.
Awareness of God reminds us every day that we are part of something bigger than
ourselves, that an amazing amount of invisible support is just a prayer away
and that our lives have a point and a purpose beyond financial success!
Don’t let organized religion’s many failures cause you to miss out on
religion’s many positive contributions! Stay connected to your religion and
be serious about that connection!
My fellow Catholics! These four foundation stones, if
built upon with care, focus and determination, make up the cornerstones of a
good life, in whatever direction you go! Those who came before you have given you
an excellent foundation on which to build! Now heed the words of Saint Paul,
“Each one of you must be careful how he builds!” Remember the words of George
Bernard Shaw, “Life is about creating yourself!” Regardless of your age, you still
have the freedom and tools to make something of yourself! Rise to the
challenge! What you do with the freedom and tools given to you is up to you! I
pray that each of you will develop a passionate commitment both to “who you
are” and “what you do!” I pray that you will seek to be good and good at it!
For God's sake, decide today not to be guided by "what everyone else is
doing and what everyone else is thinking!" Be better, reach higher,
control yourself and remember this: “A good tree does not bear rotten fruit, nor does a rotten tree
bear good fruit."
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