IS CARING WEARING YOU OUT?

COMPASSION FATIGUE

As much as I have worked to eliminate it, as much as I have been able to accomplish with the help of others, I still suffer sometimes from bouts of self-doubt and exhaustion. I guess you might say that I sometimes find myself worn out with caring. 

The biggest question I wrestle with is, "Why do I even care about other people's needs and problems?" The biggest temptation I keep coming back to is this one. "Promise yourself that this will be your very last helping project!" Unlike so many other people, especially people raising children who can't quit, I know down-deep that my problem with all this is self-inflicted. I could just walk away and quit caring, but I can't. I know that if I were to quit caring, I would just be trading my over-caring for guilt about not caring. Besides, I realize that I seem to be able to handle stress a bit more than I can handle guilt. 

I do understand that most of my issues are mere aggravations, while other people are dealing with serious problems, so I try not to complain. I realize that not caring would actually ruin my life so I have concluded that all I really need to do is to take a healthy break from caring every once in a while. Rested, I might actually be more effective in my caring about the needs of others. I read somewhere that Mother Teresa instructed her nuns to take an entire year off from their duties every 4-5 years to allow themselves to heal from the effects of their care-giving work. Reading that, I realized that I really have nothing to complain about! 

SOME PROFESSIONAL INSIGHTS

Compassion Fatigue

People whose professions lead to prolonged exposure to other people's trauma can be vulnerable to compassion fatigue, also known as secondary or vicarious trauma; they can experience acute symptoms that put their physical and mental health at risk, making them wary of giving and caring.

Feeling Another’s Pain

Empathy is a valuable trait for the military, first responders, ministers, humanitarian aid workers, health care professionals, therapists, advocates for victims of domestic abuse, moderators of offensive online content, and journalists on the front lines of war and disaster. But the more such individuals open themselves up to others' pain, the more likely they will come to share those victims' feelings of heartbreak and devastation. This sapped ability to cope with secondary trauma can lead to total exhaustion of one’s mental and physical state.

What are the symptoms?

Those who regularly experience vicarious trauma often neglect their own self-care and inner life as they struggle with images and stories that can’t be forgotten. Symptoms of compassion fatigue can include exhaustion, disrupted sleep, anxiety, headaches, stomach upset, irritability, numbness, a decreased sense of purpose, emotional disconnection, self-contempt, and difficulties with personal relationships.

What causes compassion fatigue?

Compassion fatigue can affect the most dedicated workers—people who continue to help by working extra shifts or foregoing days off, neglecting their own self-care. This can result from exposure to a single case of trauma, or from years of accumulated “emotional residue."

Is compassion fatigue the same as burnout?

Burnout is not the same as compassion fatigue. Feeling drained from everyday stressors like work and childrearing results in burnout. Compassion fatigue is the strain of feeling for another’s pain. However, the symptoms are often similar for burnout.