I love being "with people," but I love "being alone" as well. I always laugh to myself when people let me know, sometimes not so subtly, that they feel sorry for me for "never having married" or "having to live alone!" I chalk it up to them never having experienced what I experience, so I just laugh to myself and let it slide! I do know one thing for sure. I could never write homilies or publish a blog if I had to live in a noisy house! I have also learned that I need to be "away from people" so as to be able to enjoy "being with people." I guess you would say that I am a true "introvert," one who gains the strength he needs to be "with people" by withdrawing for a while "from people."
I know there are priests who fear living alone and want and need to live with other priests. Personally, I have known for a long time that I do not want to end up living in a house with other old priests! There is nothing wrong with wanting that, but personally it sounds too much like "seminary warmed over" to me!
One can never know just how one will "end up," but I have tried to plan as best as I can for my senior years since I was first ordained. I bought my first house in 1975. It cost $6,500.00. I had $2,500.00 in Christmas Club money that I had saved over five years and borrowed the rest. I remember being so worried about how I was going to pay off a $4,000.00 loan. My salary back then was $90.00 a month with room and board. My long-term goal was to fix-up and flip houses until I owned a house in which I could retire. I reached my goal a few years ago. I have flipped seven houses over the last forty years and ended up in a paid-off two-level condo.
The people who sold my condo to me called the downstairs level a "mother-in-law suite." One of their mother's lived separately downstairs. It has it's own kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, large living room, walk-in closets and a deck. I bought it precisely because it was actually two small condos connected. I wanted to anticipate the day I would need a caretaker close, but not sharing the same space with me. I had even bought an in-home health care policy when I was fifty to pay my care-taker who would be living downstairs.
In my experience, extroverts seem to pity introverts while introverts seem to pity extroverts. However, "One size does not fit all!" Rather than force everyone into one type of living arrangement, we just need to have several options. As far as priests go, if that is to happen new priests will have to plan for it and work for it starting when they are first ordained or else inherit it or win the lottery! When I was teaching soon-to-be priests at St. Meinrad, every year I would give each of them $100 to open an IRA to start saving for retirement with the this warning. "Do not trust the Church to take care of you in your old age! It is "supposed to," but what if it has so little money that it "can't? Give yourself some options!"
One can never know just how one will "end up," but I have done some home-work and I hope that I can use the options I have prepared or at least be able to adapt to unforeseen changes as they come!
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