Have
you ever wondered about your own death date? Have you ever let yourself imagine
it? Have you made plans for it? I have and I am trying to keep them up-to-date. ! I have a last will and
testament and a designated executor. I have a “living will” outlining my wishes
about end-of-life issues. Unmarried and childless, I decided against life-insurance. I have a funeral service outlined with
readings, music and a priest-homilist (and a back-up) selected. I have a burial spot ready and a tombstone already erected. Abbey Caskets, over at Saint Meinrad where I
used to work, is giving me one of their caskets so I decided against funeral insurance as well.
I have
an in-home health care policy that I bought when I turned fifty so I might be
spared, for a while at least, going to a nursing home. I have saved all through
my ordained life to be able to pay my bills so as not to be a burden to my
family, my friends or the archdiocese. I have gotten annual
physicals and monitored my health on a regular basis. Like that old “Ronco
Rotisserie Oven” commercial used to put it on TV, I have “set it” and now I
want to “forget it.” Having prepared the best that I can for dying,
I now want to go on living the best I can, for as long as I
can!
Yes, I
have my proverbial bags packed. I just don’t know the day or the hour. I have
no control over how I will die, but I do have a few hopes about
how my life will end. I don’t know if it will be quick and easy or drawn out
and painful. I only hope I don't have to suffer. I have never been very good at
that! I can’t even handle the flu all that well! Filled with amazement and
gratitude, and hopefully free of pain, I pray that I am aware of what is
happening so that I can embrace it rather than leave this world kicking and screaming. If
it is painful, I pray that I can handle it with dignity and
grace, without too much aggravation to those around me.
Even though I may have to update these plans every now and then, I plan to go on living with all the passion and energy that I can muster. When I retired, I most certainly did not want to sit in a rocking chair and wait till I died! I did not want to sit around talking about medications, insurance policies, doctor’s appointments and what various nursing homes have to offer. I wanted to “set it and forget it” and have my plans in place so I could forget about them until I needed them!
I do not want to pamper myself or let myself be pampered!
Instead, I want to live simply, recreate myself over and over by doing some things that I have
never done. One of those things was to volunteer in the Caribbean Missions
where life is hard, where that reality could teach me how good I have it now
and how lucky I have been most of my life. After that, I moved on to the
missions of east Africa. In retirement, I wanted to keep working so that I
could make some extra funds for giving back to others, as I have so generously
been given to! So far, so good! I have not pulled out my final plans and looked at
them for a couple of years, so now is a good time for a quick review and any needed adjustments if needed. However, a few people do know where those plans are when they will need them!
What
about you? Are you brave enough, and have faith enough, to let yourself think
about your own death? Are you so in denial that you are willing to stick your
family with the burden of what to do with you when you die? Are you wasting the
time you have left, just waiting around to die, or are you still reinventing
yourself so that you can keep on living a full life as long as you can? Are you
doing those things that are necessary to maintain good health or are you still
engaged in addictive habits that put your health at risk? Have you talked to
your family about end-of- life issues and signed the proper papers that will
help them follow your wishes? Are you prepared well enough now to be able to
lay your preparations aside and live with passion, intensity and purpose? Are
you prepared spiritually to meet your Maker whatever the day or the hour?
As we
try to live a full and rich life, there are two extremes to be avoided: the
failure to think about death on one hand and an obsessive preoccupation with
death on the other. Instead of trying to “get ready” at the last minute, or
being totally caught off guard, the best approach is to “stay awake,” have
"your bags packed" and "keep on living," because you do not know on
which day your Lord will come! As Isaiah the
Prophet put it to God, "Would that you would meet us doing right and being
mindful of your ways!"
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