I used to
eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural
causes.
Why do you
have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for
your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going? (taxes)
Once
you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for
eternity?
What
disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it
that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to
put wheels on luggage?
Why is it
that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like
every two hours?
If a deaf
person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do
people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at
things on the ground?
Why do
doctors leave the room while you change??? They're going to see you naked
anyway.
Why do
toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which
no decent human being would eat?
Can a
hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the
professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he
fix a hole in a boat?
If corn
oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby
oil made from?
If
electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do the
Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did
you just try singing the two songs above?
Did you
ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when
you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
How did
the man who made the first clock, know what time it was?
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